Culture Post #6: Arranged Marriages

[Kaitlin Markoja]

The concept of arranged marriage remains an important part of Indian culture.  Today, the majority of marriages in India are still arranged.  Families choose spouses for their children who they believe will be compatible, good partners.  Looks, age, and profession are among the factors considered when selecting prospective spouses.  Intercaste and interfaith marriages are extremely rare.  Astrological compatibility may also be considered throughout the selection process.  There are many variations in arranged marriage.  For example, a bride and groom to be may meet and date before the marriage or, conversely, may meet for the very first time only on the day they are married.  In contrast to the dramatic or devastating way in which arranged marriage is often portrayed and perceived in western cultures, in India arranged marriage is seen as the norm.  It is believed that the husband and wife grow to know and truly love each other over time.  The majority of married people I met in India had arranged marriages and recalled the arrangement quite fondly.  I met a girl whose family was in the process of arranging a marriage for her.  She was very appreciative of her parents finding her a suitable husband.  This girl was studying quite hard in school and said she couldn't imagine having the time to date and find a spouse herself.  Another girl who I met asked, "Don't your parents love you?" when I told her that my own family would not be arranging my marriage.  In India, arranging a suitable marriage is seen as an act of love, a duty to be fulfilled by one's parents.  Now, in urban areas, it is quite common for the daughter or son to have a say in who he or she might like to marry.  Parents still arrange possible partners, but children may indicate whether they are interested in a particular match.  The divorce rate in India is around 1%.  Advocates for arranged marriage say this number is indicative of the success of arranged marriages, while others may speculate that the rate is so low because divorce is not well accepted in Indian society.