Culture #2: Some Iranian Customs

[Conal R Smith]

As a general overview to Iranian customs, the country has also preserved many pre-Islamic customs.

The family is central to Iranian life and they put it at the core of their social structure. It is custom for female relatives to be protected from outside influences and are taken care of at all times. For this reason, it is inappropriate to ask questions about an Iranian’s wife or other female relatives.

Although the custom in Iran, for the majority of people, is to only have 1 or 2 children, extended family is usually very close which forms a tight network. It is custom for family loyalties to be prioritized against any other relationships and nepotism in Iran is generally considered a good thing.

Iranians typically see themselves as having two distinct identities: “zaher” (public) and “batin” (private). When they are in public, they must conform to accepted modes of behavior, which are often legally dictated.

The only part of their lives where they can be themselves is within their homes and among their inner circle. It is custom in Iran for the inner circle to form the basis of a person’s social and business network. Friendship is very important and extends into business. The people from the inner circle can be relied upon to: offer advice, help find a job, or cut through bureaucracy.

Taarof is a system of politeness that includes both verbal and non-verbal communication. Furthermore, Iranians protest compliments and attempt to appear vulnerable in public.They consciously belittle their own accomplishments in an attempt to appear humble and modest, although other Iranians understand that this is merely courtesy and do not take the words at face value. With respect to taarof, if you are ever offered something, like a tea or sweet, even if you want it, at first decline it until their insistence becomes greater.

http://www.kwintessential.co.uk/articles/article/Iran/Customs-in-Iran/113