In my interactions with my language partner I have come to observe an astounding amount of interpersonal contact between her and her family on a daily basis. Many of her stories told refer to her family and their interactions rather than the large parties and humorous events experienced between friends that those in the American culture prefer to address in conversation. I initially discounted this trend, believing it to be the product of homesickness or some other emotion that produced elevated feelings for and desire to consistently recall her family but upon further reflection I decided to research the distinctive qualities of the Polish household, its history, and the values that emerge within its related community as a result.
What I discovered was that the Polish culture values family higher than any other achievable goal in life. Contrary to the American dream of leaving home, going off and making something of one's self and striking it rich in some way or another, the Poles value a happy marriage and a happy family life over everything else. The great importance of the family unit in Polish culture is a result of the condensation over time of a strong cultural bond with the community over time. Scholars claim that in medieval times, when surrounding countries were experiencing peasant revolts and other types of rebellions to equalize the wealth and power of individual families, the Poles remained entirely peaceful toward their feudal leadership. Nobles in the Polish community regarded themselves and their subjects as a cohesive family unit with different roles rather than as the common european understanding of a type of master-slave relationship. Over time, the feelings of trust and respect that existed within this early Polish culture was forced to condense with the collapse of feudalism, causing what was once a great love of the nation of Poland and its fairness to become an equally great respect and trust of others in ones community. Since, the size of what the Pole considered the family unit has shrunk to what the rest of the world conceives of it as, however the Polish culture still retains a nations worth of love, trust, and respect within a single household according to scholars. As a result, anything that other cultures would seek outside of the home, such as finding a job, getting a loan, or buying an apartment the Poles seek within the home, often working for extended family or friends of relatives and living in additions built on family property.
Contrary to the common causes for dissolution of family bonds in Europe and America, where sexual preference, religious preference, and disobedience amount to unforgivable betrayals, studies have shown that the only offense that results in the expulsion of one from a family in Poland is the betrayal of the community or nation to a threatening power. This understanding appears to be a cultural representation of the lingering age-old motifs of trust and respect that echo from the mediaeval period erupting in response to the hostile takeovers that Poland has experienced in the recent historical events of World War II and the Cold War. Perhaps this is a factor in the cultural distrust and lack of communication with individuals who are unable to replicate the grammar forms of politeness in the polish language that I have previously described. It is reasonable to think that those Poles who had spent so long in foreign countries that they were considered by their own countrymen as "betrayers" were identifiable through their awkwardness with the nuance of Polish language and therefore were largely spurned and ignored. The ability for those who sold out their comrades to the invasive powers during this time period would still be able to mimic a universal nonverbal politeness which may explain why this is currently discounted and distrusted in the Polish culture.
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