The institution of marriage vastly changes throughout the world and it is much different in Turkish culture than in others. During our MLC 105 class we briefly spoke about the institutions of marriage and a discussion of Turkish marriage would be apropos.
A variety of marriages exist in Turkish culture that may not be prevalent in other societies. For example, when the death of a brother occurs the widowed sister-in law is wed with the single brother-in law. This type of practice is known as the “Levirat”. The sister can also marry a deceased sister’s husband known as a “Sororat”. This type of tradition is very rural and is increasingly practiced less and less.
Additionally, there is type of marriage in which children from previous marriages may get married called a “taygeldi”. There is also another type, the “oturakalma”, where a woman simply settles in the home of a man. Marriages were also fixed during older times when children were still in their cradles. Additionally, Polygamy is also outlawed and punishable by law.
Generally, men are usually expected to marry after completion of the mandatory military service around 22 and 20. Men are also supposed to court the female and it is usually done through the “Goruculuk” in which the groom to be’s women friends or family (gorucus or the one who participate in the Goruculuk) visits the home of the potential bride (kIz bakma). If the woman is deemed suitable than the families of both the bride and groom meet to discuss further arrangements. The final agreement between the families to marry is known as the “Soz Kesme”.
The engagement usually begins with an “Invitation to the neighbors” at the bride’s home. This is an engagement party in which both families are present to celebrate. The woman is given jewelry called “takI” by the mother-in-law. Finally, what the families agree upon for the engagement determines how long it may last. Traditionally, breaking off an engagement is very bad since meeting the parents is considered very important.
The “Kin Gecesi” is considered to be the bachelorette party and is where the bride has henna tattooed to her hand. There is usually song and dance to accompany this type of party.
After this bachelorette party the following day is considered the “Gelin Alma”. This is where the brides is fetched by those in the procession and take her to the grooms’ house. The procession consists of drums and pipes as they walk through the street. Once the bride arrives at the groom’s house she is met by the mother-in-law who bears a gift. Afterwards, the groom is taken out by his friends, shaven and cleanly dressed to attend the night prayer (YatsI NamazI) at the local mosque. Finally, he returns home with the hodja or preacher from the local mosque. After the ceremony is performed both the bride and groom enter the “Gerdek” or nuptial chamber.
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